Mayhaps I Have an Agent

Thursday I meet with my possible new agent. This talent agent was not my first choice, but certainly wasn't on the "hell no" list. Thanks, Universe.

An unrelated note on etiquette: Never, ever walk up to a friend who acts for either a living or for a hobby and burp out the phrase "still acting?", unless it is your express intent to offend and demean your friend's chosen craft / hobby. Also don't be surprised if I bark "still doing all that boring mess you do that no one cares about?" in response. Jerkwad.

Go Ahead and Judge, I Got a Rock for Your Glass House

Acting at this point is less of a profession for me, and more of an expensive hobby. I barely break even between expenses and earnings each year. (Yes, IRS, I report my earnings and expenses truthfully!)

Recently I took part in an acting class that was (not exactly) guaranteed to help me land a talent agent. In the past, I've had good luck booking extra and featured extra roles myself. The upside to this is that I keep all the money I earn. The downside to representing myself is that I obviously don't have access to as many roles as the talent agents do. So it's time for an agent! I spent $225 on this class which was supposed to last seven weeks, but ended up lasting eleven weeks. My wallet and calendar were taken hostage by this class. At the urging of the acting coach, I ended up shelling out an additional $701 for new actor photos & prints, media kit supplies, costume pieces and props.

On the night of the big showcase I remembered all my lines and gave scene performances that made me proud for an audience of talent agents and casting directors. After the showcase, my peers hailed me as the best in the class. The talent agent I most wanted to court complimented me on great performances. One of the casting directors introduced herself, and another casting director remembered me from my past work with him. The (fear-inspiring, outspoken, very opinionated) acting coach hugged me and said my scenes "were perfect". BUT (and it is a HUGE but), a week later, I still haven't had an offer from an agent. Yep, it's demoralizing.

People tell me I'm a good actress. People say I don't break their camera lenses. I lost 32 pounds in pursuit of an acting career. I exercise. I eat healthfully. I moisturize. I remember my lines. I show up on time. I bring my props and costumes/wardrobe. I respond promptly to any and all inquiries for work. I bring my 8x10 photos with résumés trimmed and attached. I am ready for this, dammit! Come on, Universe!

"Of all the words of mice and men, the saddest are `It might have been.' " -- Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.

I don't mind if I'm a has-been actress someday, as long as I'm not a never-been actress.